Untitled.
20 July 1998
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"i don't know if it was butterflies in my stomach, or if it was just that i hadn't eaten all day."
friday evening i'm driving down to westport, and setting out i think, it would really suck if my car died half way there, which isn't an altogether uncommon thought for me, but sure enough, about half way there, something in my engine locks up and starts smoking. so i drive my car at about 5mph the half mile back to the last phone, and call george 'cause i'm about 20mins from his house. he came down and picked me up, drove into work a few hours early, and let me borrow his car to drive the rest of the way to the concert. george is pretty cool.
so i get to the concert and find erin and meet some of her friends and it was cool, and then afterward erin offers to give me a ride home, but because it would be about two and a half hours out of her way, i refuse, and we end up sitting around in the parking lot for a couple of hours where i was completely lost in something of an internal faerie tale world, and then we went our separate ways, and i ended up sleeping on the floor of george's office. i should've let erin drive me home.
saturday, after sleeping a few more hours in the morning, i borrowed my mom's car and drove into hartford to hang out with erin at another nields show. afterwards, erin and her brother matt and i wandered around hartford, looking for the river, which we never actually found. and then we sat around in bushnell park, playing bottle-bottle and other inspired games and generally making fools of ourselves.
afterwards, i drove up 91 to amherst to see bret. i got there about 1230p, he was out at the movies, so i watched some stupid tv, and then just sorta hung out when he got back. got another poor night of sleep on a teeny little couch, (since they're renting their big couch out as a bed for $100 a month), and when it got too hot and cramped to sleep anymore i got up and went out to bread and circus to buy some food. hung out with bret some more when i got back, although everything was closed by that point, and then he and steph and i thought about going to the movies, but it was kinda late, and so rented a movie instead. and then i drove home.
i've had to kinda censor myself today, which i really hate doing. not that anyone reads this anyway, but there's stuff that i really just shouldn't go into even though my reaction is important to my current frame of mind. of course food is important to my current frame of mind too. so maybe i should look into that.
okay. so i didn't really say anything in that stuff above that i wrote this morning that i was planning on saying while i was composing it in my head during the ride from hartford to amherst and then from amherst home. 'cept for the butterflies bit. so what was it that i wanted to say? damned if i know really. that i'm still lonely? that i like having my head rubbed? yeah, well...
friday evening i'm driving down to westport, and setting out i think, it would really suck if my car died half way there, which isn't an altogether uncommon thought for me, but sure enough, about half way there, something in my engine locks up and starts smoking. so i drive my car at about 5mph the half mile back to the last phone, and call george 'cause i'm about 20mins from his house. he came down and picked me up, drove into work a few hours early, and let me borrow his car to drive the rest of the way to the concert. george is pretty cool.
so i get to the concert and find erin and meet some of her friends and it was cool, and then afterward erin offers to give me a ride home, but because it would be about two and a half hours out of her way, i refuse, and we end up sitting around in the parking lot for a couple of hours where i was completely lost in something of an internal faerie tale world, and then we went our separate ways, and i ended up sleeping on the floor of george's office. i should've let erin drive me home.
saturday, after sleeping a few more hours in the morning, i borrowed my mom's car and drove into hartford to hang out with erin at another nields show. afterwards, erin and her brother matt and i wandered around hartford, looking for the river, which we never actually found. and then we sat around in bushnell park, playing bottle-bottle and other inspired games and generally making fools of ourselves.
afterwards, i drove up 91 to amherst to see bret. i got there about 1230p, he was out at the movies, so i watched some stupid tv, and then just sorta hung out when he got back. got another poor night of sleep on a teeny little couch, (since they're renting their big couch out as a bed for $100 a month), and when it got too hot and cramped to sleep anymore i got up and went out to bread and circus to buy some food. hung out with bret some more when i got back, although everything was closed by that point, and then he and steph and i thought about going to the movies, but it was kinda late, and so rented a movie instead. and then i drove home.
i've had to kinda censor myself today, which i really hate doing. not that anyone reads this anyway, but there's stuff that i really just shouldn't go into even though my reaction is important to my current frame of mind. of course food is important to my current frame of mind too. so maybe i should look into that.
okay. so i didn't really say anything in that stuff above that i wrote this morning that i was planning on saying while i was composing it in my head during the ride from hartford to amherst and then from amherst home. 'cept for the butterflies bit. so what was it that i wanted to say? damned if i know really. that i'm still lonely? that i like having my head rubbed? yeah, well...