magicbeans. nothing if not awkward.

so first the bits of yesterday that i didn't get too last night:

i got a postcard in the mail from yuka. the postcard was from france, but she sent it through inter-campus mail. she wrote a silly little story about an apple on it. it made me smile.

i got a phone call inquiring as to whether or not i would be interested in being a student representative to the risd judicial board. which actually, i would, but it meets wednesday mornings and i've got classes.

and the bit about jen. saw her at dinner. she was with matthew, but we talked quite a bit. more so when he was away from the table, i noticed, and after he left. but it was kinda nice anyway. i had sorta felt that regardless of this whole crush thing, jen and i were becoming better friends at one point, but things hadn't really felt that way since that night happened.

of course can i really handle being friends when i obviously still have this big crush?

and then she went to do homework and i went to the mixed media meeting. which is another whole group of budding friendships that seem to have kinda fizzled out. i say hello to them when i see them around campus. i'll occasionally eat a meal with one or two of them. but for the most part the only real interaction has receded back to the weekly mixed media meeting. i don't know what, if anything, i can, or want to, do about that.

on the other hand, as i'm back spending more time in the beb, my social life and studio life are beginning to overlap quite a bit again. or, in other words, i don't feel like i have much of a social life outside of the studio and the met. which is not all together bad. there's a lot of cool people in architecture, and the studio is far from a sterile work-only environment. but sometimes i want more. if not a romantic relationship, at least someone with whom i'm close enough to complain about my lack of a romantic relationship. (there's a hint of sarcasm in that last sentence that may not come across in plain text. imagine it said with a smile and a half-felt laugh.)

---

and today: although most of the toxic smell in the studio had dissipated by this morning, i still got a terrible headache, presumably from the residual fumes. i placed an official complaint with the architecture office.

over the weekend i order a few cds online of various indie-pop bands whose names end with the word stars. thematic cd buying can be fun. especially because i had never even heard of a couple of the bands. (at which point you say: bean, yr an addict, you need help.) they arrived today. and they're all pretty good. i'll probably talk more about them after i've had a chance to listen to them all a few times through.

went and saw the painting and sculpture senior show tonight. they are probably the two majors at risd where you can basically do whatever you fell like doing, so a lot of the work in the show was simply that. some of it was nice though. i think i'll go back over the weekend when there's not quite so many people there, and take a closer look.

stopped at the library on the way back down to the studio to say hello to yuka. and thank her for the postcard.

i was the only person from my section working in the studio tonight. i guess they're all gearing up for this weekend. construction. i had to work out the details of my new door design. left about 1130.