magicbeans. nothing if not awkward.

i've been making myself to-do lists the last few days. i haven't been totally on the ball about getting everything on them done, but it's helped some. this morning i finally got around to doing laundry and registering for a non-credit summer italian class at brown. paid off my checking account overdraft. returned books on shanghai to the brown library.

i'm trying to streamline so that it's just me and my office building for the next three weeks. the thought that architectural practise is a lot like architecture school scares me sometimes. but at least in practise you don't have all the other stuff to deal with. it's all about the architectural project(s) at hand. i'm hoping that the rest of this month will be like that.

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home from work and ate two burritos "the size of my head". a quick look in my closet yielded a raver outfit for the beaux arts ball. chris.k was wearing jeans cut off real short and cowboy boots. garth went with his standby indie-rock shirt and tie. brought my video camera along like last year.

large crowds always make me a bit uncomfortable. sort of an inferiority thing. not that they're better than me (i agree with garth's observation that really, most people are pretty lame), but that they're more socially adept than me. it's more of this whole anti-social thing.

part of it also might stem from that fact that when i do run into someone that i would like to talk to in these sorts of big party situations the conversation is going to be short and fleeting before they're swept off in the opposite direction and that isn't enough contact for me.

i know, i'm being contradictory. on one hand i don't want to interact with people at all. on the other hand i want to interact with people but feel that i don't have the necessary skills or that the snippets of interaction that i do have are too superficial and unfulfilling.

and really, i had an okay time. i'm glad that i got a chance to see some of the people who i never see this year, even if i would have liked to talk with them for longer. i'm glad that i got dressed up and went out.

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saw susie on the way home. "you were in a dream that i had," she said. "we were building you a giant typewriter to live in. and you were driving around in a bublegum pink hatch-back, but it was kind of beat up and dented. and you said that a cop had pulled you over but didn't give you a ticket because you lived in the same apartment building."