magicbeans. nothing if not awkward.

finished #54, the first of my "abstracted floor" pieces. and actually, the first of my numbered pieces to be truly finished so far. the other two (three?) need some text i think. i found an old, coverless copy of a book called the gateless barrier on one of the cenci bookshelves. the books there are things that have accumulated over the years that the ehp has been running. people take things, leave things. mostly novels and outdated travel books. my initial intention was to find a book that i could rip pages out of and collage on top of them. and this looked like a good candidate. on first inspection it didn't seem to be a work of great literature, it was somewhat obscure, already missing its cover, and i didn't really think that anyone would miss it. but then i sort of grew attached to it. i've still only read the first chapter, but i've done some poking around online. its author, lucas malet, is really mary kingsley, the daughter of novelist charles kingsley. and it seems to be obscure almost to the point of being completely forgotten, and i feel as if i'm now somehow responsible for its legacy.

anyway, i have been selecting text, somewhat at random, for each of the pieces that i've been working on. scanning the appropriate page, printing it back out, and cutting the text out of the printout. or that's the plan. i've done it for #53, and have a few more pieces waiting to go when i can get into the library and scan some more pages tomorrow. i think that i want to use text from the book in the figurative pieces too, but i'm not sure if the format should be the same, or if i should hand letter it, which was the original idea when i wasn't sure where the text was coming from.

when the studios closed at midnight i called stef. wednesday is looking like our phone day. and it was good. phones are still hard, but she pointed out that i have been doing better, and really, i have to. i want her voice in my ear, i want that kind of closeness that there's really no other way to get. and so even if it's just small talk, i'll do my best. and i've said it before, but it's always nice talking to her. even when it is all awkward phoneness. but it was okay tonight. and good. and we're always getting closer and closer to being back together.