magicbeans. nothing if not awkward.

spent a lot of time crying today.

doing my best to distract myself, but it doesn't always work. and sometimes the distraction itself reminds me. went and saw men in black ii with garth and chris.k. it was something i needed to do, to take that experience back for myself, i was supposed to go see it with her. at the same time, it leads me to thinking: i should be doing this with her.

sat around at the mill reading comics after the movie. garth gave me a ride home and there was a car pulling into the parking lot as we left. 'there's susie,' he said.

'and who's the cute girl driving?'

but i'm not really interested in cute girls. last night i almost wrote to kate.k. (and said what exactly? i just broke up with my girlfriend and so i figured i'd try to get back in touch with you because we flirted at a party once. yeah, okay.) but i don't want anyone else.

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amongst all this, it's alex.s's birthday. i text messaged him, (no idea if he actually got it):

happy birthday, and as clicé as it sounds, truly heartfelt hopes that all your wishes come true. -bean