magicbeans. nothing if not awkward.

so i'm kinda sad tonight. i've been thinking about ex-girlfriends. although not allison really. just the ones i'm still friends with, although i haven't talked to any of them in a long time.

i slept until eleven this morning. although sometime earlier i just sat up awake in bed. i'm not sure what time that was. i thought it was like ten or something, but the next time i woke up it was only eight. saw trevor at brunch. that's rare, as he has new friends now (he's in one of those real outer houses).

and maybe that was the start of things going downhill. although for the most part the day was okay. i went to staples and bought two lamps for my drafting table in the studio. i worked on my orthographic/isometric model for drawing. had dinner. went back to the studio. worked until eleven or so.

came back to my room for a while, and that's when i started really feeling all this kinda blueness. and thinking about er!n and sonali. and q maybe.

and then i went to this party, although i had made up my mind not to drink tonight. and there were quite a few of my friends there, so it was kinda cool. except there was still this whole ex-girlfriend thing. and the whole new crushes thing. and really i just wasn't enjoying myself too much.

and alex.h was leaving and i said party that i'm not really enjoying on one hand, empty room that i won't be enjoying on the other. and yuka said well, lets do something else. and so the two of them and cybèle and i left. and we went back to yaka's for a bit. but alex.h and cybèle wanted to go to bed, and yuka was going to do some gouaching. and so.

and i guess i should go to bed, it's after two o'clock and i have to be in the studio at ten to go to home depot. but.