magicbeans. nothing if not awkward.

my hands. photo by er!n with my camera. scanned, cropped, and filtered by me.

last night about midnight, just as i was finishing typing up my journal entry, i sneezed. woke up kinda stuffy this morning. that came and went, but i started coughing over the course of the day. decided to just hang out and rest tonight. slept for a couple hours this evening and woke up feeling even more congested. i think the heat and dryness of my room wasn't helping. felt better as soon as i cracked a window.

anyway, hope i'm not coming down with this week-long cold/flu thing that seems to be going around. i should go get some vitamins tomorrow. boost my immune system. i really can't afford to miss any classes with such a tight schedule.

spent most of today in the cad lab. once it was open. there seems to be some confusion about monitors and monitors during class time if the teacher isn't around and other stuff of that ilk. despite the fact that they seem to think there's enough monitors and they don't need me. shrug.

saw alex.h at breakfast. didn't really see too many other people i knew for the rest of the day. i'm kinda feeling out of the loop. alex.h was talking about how he and kris and whomever else went out and got a couch for yuka and zanetta's place last night. and i know he was there the night before making milk shakes for yuka and jen. and it seems like somehow people make plans and get together and do things. but i'm never aware of anything. i'm lucky to run into people in the met anymore.

i occasionally will read my horoscope, i've never seen any real predictive value in them, but just for something to do. every now and then they're uncannily accurate though. maybe it's just the law of averages, they've got to be on the mark sooner or later. but you decide, here is my horoscope for today (this is not just one of those newspaper columns, but is s'posedly based on my exact time and place of birth):

This influence, although brief, can have a disruptive effect on your relationships. The problem is that it tends to make you feel very lonely and isolated, as if there is no one you can communicate with. And this can be a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Perhaps unconsciously you send out signals to others declaring that you do not want to be bothered. You may get into a depressed mood that baffles the people around you, so they give up on you for the time being and stop trying to help you. There is a strong tendency to look on the dark side of life and to react much more strongly to disappointments and failures than to reinforcement from others and success. The best way to handle such feelings is to do nothing. Don't take them seriously and don't make any decisions based on the way you feel now.

now, this very accurately describes the way i spent a good part of my teenage years and how i still feel fairly regularly. so maybe it's not all that strange. but the fact that the feeling grew stronger and stronger over the course of the day, previous to my reading the horoscope, just seemed a little odd.