magicbeans. nothing if not awkward.

i was woken up about nine by the phone. (which means i got about twelve hours of sleep, so it was time to get out of bed.) it was ian from my performance class, and he and jennifer were filming and needed someone to do some camera work. so i said i'd be there about ten. got up, took a shower. while i was in the shower he called back and said that a few other people from our class had shown up, and they didn't need my assistance anymore.

i figured that i should go anyway, 'cause getting out and seeing other people working might inspire me to do so myself. stopped at the met to get some breakfast. then headed over to the tap room where they were working. i ended up just hanging out and watching for most of the morning. threw myself into some piled up chairs. crawled around in the chairs. stacked them haphazardly and climbed them. some of it's on tape.

stopped by the mixed media office afterwards. hung out there for most of the day. reading comics. playing with my camera. while susie worked on the new issue. occasionally offering advice or engaging in conversation.

went to dinner with susie. i think i kinda gave chris the cold shoulder, and feel bad about it. he sat by himself. i sat with susie. garth eventually came in and sat with him, then some other transfer students. some other mixed media and associated people came and sat with us.

i went over to say hi to cybèle at one point and mentioned that i felt as if i had these two separate little worlds. i sorta started feeling that way after susie's show/party this weekend. and i'm very reluctant to mix the two. susie said to me today that i'm the first transfer student that she's friends with. and i said that i'm probably one of the most introverted ones too. things are odd sometimes.

came home very briefly after dinner. then back over to memorial hall for the mixed media meeting. i've basically been a regular since the beginning of the school year, but i'm just starting to feel comfortable at the meetings. the feeling's been kinda growing for a while, basically over the course of wintersession, but hanging out in the office for a good part of this week didn't hurt either.

and afterward went to see man on the moon with susie and dana (randi's roommate, not herself a mixed media staff member, but part of the extended family). the movie was excellent. it's only the second good movie that jim carrey's ever been in, but he's due a touch more respect as a decent actor because of it; the truman show was not just a one time fluke in his career. the rest of the movie was all very good as well. funny, sad, engaging.

and it was nice going with susie. it might just be a backlash to the whole jen situation, or it might just be one of my little crushes that i have all the time (lasting anywhere between a couple of hours and a couple of months), or maybe it's just making a new friend, but i really enjoyed spending time with her today.